When I was pregnant last time around, to prepare for giving birth we went to the NHS antenatal classes, I went to pregnancy yoga weekly, I read lots of books, magazines and blogs. It was the only time I could watch ‘One born every minute’ (couldn’t stomach it before or after!) We decided against paying for the NCT antenatal classes as we didn’t feel like we needed them, and they seemed like an extravagance.
Fast forward two years, and I can’t believe I’m contemplating this, but I’m thinking of doing NCT…. To buy some new friends!!
See, most of the mums I’ve met since having W who had done NCT generally agreed that the classes were ok but the best thing about it was the new lifelong friends they’d met…. Often the dads as well as the mums.
When I was on maternity leave last time around I was lucky to know about 5 people that were also off, who I did meet up with from time-to-time. I met some lovely people at the long list of classes I did, but never felt quite confident enough to suggest meeting up for a coffee/play date. Quite a few of these lovely people were already in NCT groups (they’d met at the classes) and they seemed like clans… impenetrable. Inseparable.
So I was quite envious of them at times. They were in whatsapp groups and messaged each other daily and during the night feeds. I can’t complain, whenever I felt lonely or was having a bad day, there was always a friend I could text who would understand exactly what I was going through… And I remember Twitter chats with other night feeders fondly…. But did I miss out? These little sisterhoods where you’re all going though the same issues, at the same time.
Due to the nature of NCT and the cost of the courses, I think you’d generally find like-minded people so a good chance of getting on with them, actually I only know one person who didn’t gel with her NCT group (but her OH bonded well with the dads so it was still worthwhile!)
I have plenty of friends, some with children, some without. I have a couple of close friends who’ll be off on maternity leave when I am. I’ll make plenty of new friends when W and his little brother go to school….
…but I’m still leaning towards the NCT class! It’s crazy, it will cost at least £100 at a time when we’re trying to save money. We had a positive birth experience last time around and don’t feel like we need more antenatal training (although the the refresher courses do cover topics like sibling rivalry too!)
Do you know what all this is about? FOMO (fear of missing out!), and so far FOMO is winning but I’ll see how I feel in a few weeks time 🙂
What would you do?!