Regular readers will know I love a charity shop bargain. This Christmas I’ve upped my game, I’ve bought loads of gifts for the boys from charity shops, local Facebook selling groups, and eBay.
Continue reading “Would you give your children second-hand gifts for Christmas?”
My cousin died last weekend (see news story here) but I’m not after your sympathy, I can pass that on to his wife and 3 young children, his mum and his siblings, his nephews and nieces. And his hundreds of close friends.
With just over a week to go til the EU referendum I’m so worried about some of the stuff spouted by the ‘leave’ campaign that I feel compelled to write about it….
I’m voting ‘remain’ but I’m not particularly pro-remain just so anti-the-leave campaign for the reasons below that are used by them and their supporters….
‘I’m worried about immigration. I’m voting leave so that we can control our borders, build an Australian-style points system etc etc’
I’m generally pro-immigration. I see a NHS that wouldn’t survive without immigration because we don’t train enough doctors and nurses. I work for a company that has a French CEO, in a marketing department where at least 10% are ‘immigrants’ (3x Irish, 1xGreek, 1xCypriot, 1xGerman).. All were the best people for those roles. I live in a city (Cardiff) that was at its most prosperous when immigrants (many Somalians) were working on our docks… The biggest docks in the world at the time!
Still, I get it that some people worry about losing our Britishness or whatever…
But here’s what I’m really confused about. Most of our immigrants come from outside of the EU whether they be Pakistani doctors, Australian bar staff or South American footballers… And we already have control over that… It’s nothing to do with the EU!?? So that points system, we have the power to do that already!
Most of the EU immigrants (just 5% of our population by the way) work here and pay into our economy since the recent change that they can’t claim benefits without working here first.
Which then leaves illegal immigrants and refugees. Personally I think every country should be obliged to take in refugees who are fleeing war (especially when we are the ones bombing them!) but the UK takes a very small number so I don’t think this is a game-changer for deciding on what to vote.
Illegal immigrants and controlling our borders… Personally I think we’d do better at this staying in the EU sharing resources and police intelligence, unless we were to invest heavily in this area.
So what is it about immigrants that you want to escape… Is it their ‘drain on NHS and schools‘? This brings me to my next point…
‘We can invest the money saved into the NHS (education, arts, defence, security etc)’
The Vote leave campaign have been told numerous times not to use the ‘we would save £350m a week’ message as its untrue and numerous studies show that the money that comes in more than makes up for the money going out.
So how much do we spend on the EU? Just 2% of our overall budget! So if you’re worried about the other 98%…. The NHS, education, pensions, benefits, defence etc then vote based on that in the general election!
The NHS is not on its’ arse because it’s over-run by immigrants, it’s on its’ arse because Britain voted for the Tories and their cost-cutting plan instead of the more left-wing parties who invest in public services.
Net migration is about 300k a year… Do you really think that a 0.4% increase in population (70 million) can stretch public services to breaking point?!
One of the things that has wound me up most about the ‘vote leave’ campaign is that they have NO PLAN!!! Who will run the country with David Cameron having to step down as he promised he would…. Boris Johnson? Ian Duncan Smith? George Osborne? I’m sure they would have different ideas on how to spend the ‘money saved’ but nowhere have I seen what those different scenarios would look like!
Or are you hoping Nigel Farage would be in charge? Well he’s not even an MP so it’s impossible! So despite being an MEP who’s encouraging us all to leave, he will have NO POWER to make any decisions on what happens if we do leave!!
So, so far we have a leave campaign that:
There are 2 other claims I hear that also piss me off….
‘We’ll no longer be controlled by a group of unelected people’
Ummm we vote for MEP’s that represent our needs in the European Union. (Nigel Farage is one of them!) They vote for the leader/commissioner…. Ok the European Comission above the EU seems to be a bit like our House of Lords but let’s sort our own mess out before worrying about the EC??
The EU is all democratic in the same way our British MPs represent everyone from rural mid Wales to affluent parts of the South East and deprived inner cities.
So from now on just take an interest in the European elections and vote!
And don’t forget that we already have control over some of they key things that matter… The taxes we pay, pensions and benefits, the NHS and education system…
‘Let’s make Britain Great again’
Britain was at its ‘greatest’ when it invaded half the world. I don’t think we’re planning to do that again (she hopes!)
We were also ‘great’ when we were manufacturing everything… But now we live in a globalised world where it’s cheaper for us to get our steel imported from China than to make it ourselves, we import lamb from New Zealand cheaper than we pay our British farmers for it.
So how are we going to be ‘Great’ again? Stop importing everything? Re-open all the coal mines? Sounds unrealistic to me, we’re always going to need to import and in doing so I’d rather have the negotiation power of 28 nations behind me rather than one little island!
I’m left decided that I’m voting ‘remain’ next week…
What do you think? What will you be voting? I would genuinely love to hear from you 🙂
Further reading:
Independent article about a recent poll, stats and myths: http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/eu-referendum-british-public-wrong-about-nearly-everything-survey-shows-a7074311.htm
Impartial website full of facts: https://fullfact.org
Other parenting blogs about it:
http://www.beingtillysmummy.co.uk/2016/06/why-i-am-voting-to-stay-in-eu.html?m=1
http://www.fraunaish.co.uk/eu-referendum-eu-citizen/
http://thefamilytreasures.com/2016/04/15/how-the-brexit-would-affect-our-family/
http://www.anniebobs.com/eu-referendum-remain-leave/
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Since John Lewis opened their shop in Cardiff a few years ago, I’ve been in love with them… loved the ambience of shopping there, loved their little baby feeding area, loved their brand and Christmas TV ads… And I even did my pregnancy yoga classes in their community room last time around!
But they let me down this year, and I wanted to share it as they’re still mis-selling to customers which I can’t believe (spoiler alert… It’s only over a £40 bag but it’s the principle!)
So the last screenshot I took a few weeks ago (so 4 months later) and it clearly says ‘leather’ twice…
Now checking it today I can see they’ve changed the first sentence to ‘leather look’ but they still have a misleading sentence ‘mature-looking black leather’…. IT’S NOT LEATHER!!!
So I know this might read a bit ‘first world problems’ and I know we have far bigger things to worry about… But I needed to get it off my chest!
I think it’s been pretty poor for a company that has such strong brand and customer service values and ‘never knowingly undersold’. The most frustrating thing about it all has been how long it’s taking them to update the website… Working in marketing and being a blogger, I know it’s a 2 minute job and surely they’d prioritise inaccurate info?!
Rant over. Thanks for reading.
So Jamie Oliver has got himself in trouble for daring to have an opinion on breastfeeding even though he’s… a man! (I think actually he’s mostly in trouble for saying breastfeeding is ‘easy’ but it’s hard to tell among the furore!
Well I’m glad that Jamie has chosen this as his next topic to campaign over, highlighting how important it is and how it should start with support for pregnant women.
I was actually really shocked when I read the news a couple of months ago that Britain has the worst breastfeeding rates IN THE WORLD.
Only 0.5% still breastfeed after a year in Britain, our closest neighbours are female opressors Saudi Arabia at 2%. Meanwhile poverty-stricken countries like Ethiopia manage 97%!
Why is this? Well I guess it comes down to choice… British women are asked if we’re planning on breastfeeding whereas it seems like in many African countries it’s the norm and I’d guess that only the super-rich there use formula.
Do we think these African countries have lots of help and support when they run into problems? Maybe… But I doubt it. I suspect they persevere, keep trying and rely on their sisterhood as back-up wet nurses.
I’m not having a go at those that have tried breastfeeding and run into problems, I say good on you! I’m saying that we need to see a cultural shift that makes breastfeeding the norm, not a lifestyle choice. It will take years, maybe a generation or two.
Choices… I know someone who decided not to breast-feed as she wanted her husband to bond with baby… Nonsense! There are plenty of ways dads can bond with their babies! What other reasons do we hear? Wanting to have your own freedom? Wanting to drink? Being embarrassed by your body or boobs? Not wanting to be shamed by people who think it’s ‘disgusting’?
See, we already have a lot to overcome to get people to try breastfeeding, never mind keep it up. So thank you Jamie for trying to raise the issue. We need more positive role models, people like TOWIE’s Sam Faiers… People that you can relate to so that not all the breastfeeding advocates are the mumsnet breastapo that are more likely to put people off than get them to try it!
What else do we need? Well let’s ban the formula milk companies being able to advertise their ridiculous ‘follow up’ milks so that they don’t become aspirational brands that people want to use. Give them less space in the supermarket. I’m not saying we should make it more expensive but maybe there’s a way to get those big companies to donating money to breastfeeding support every time formula milk is sold?
As for me? I’m not perfect, I’m normal, I wanted to breastfeed exclusively for 6 months but got to 3 before we started to top-up. I know I could have persevered with it. I stopped breastfeeding around the 8-9 month mark when I went back to work.
The majority of people were totally supportive of my breastfeeding but there was the odd person that pulled a face like the friend who thought breastfeeding stopped dads bonding with babies.
So let’s start a new era. Let’s talk about it. Let’s see it. Let’s make it the norm. And if you try it and it doesn’t work out, obviously let’s not shame you! #sisterhood
I mentioned in my last post that at the age of 16 months, we finally got W’s hair cut.
Why ‘finally’?!
Well ‘people’ have been suggesting I get it cut since he was about 6 months old! His hair grew quickly so by the time he was 1 he was already looking much like a little surfer dude…
I was loving this look, rats tails and all but in a heated moment of madness while he was in the bath, I decided to trim those mullet rat tails but the leave the rest.
Of course, when we got up the next day I realised that I’d totally messed up the back of his head and decided I’d prefer to cut it all off than look at my failed barber attempt every day. An emergency appointment followed, he did really well sitting down for his cut and only cried when the hair around his ears was being trimmed! Weeks later I have grown to love his new cut. He does look more grown-up, he looks totally different. I do miss his long locks though and hope they grow back soon.
He got mistaken for a girl quite a few times pre-haircut, but that didn’t bother me at all! I don’t dress him in the most masculine of clothes (follows his mum with Breton stripe tops, mustard leggings and the like) and he still plays with pink toys, but post-haircut he hadn’t been mistaken for a girl once.
I’m kinda bittersweet about it. Proud of my gorgeous boy looking all grown-up. But sad that society thinks he should have short hair, and that longer hair is a girly thing. Isn’t it a bit sad that we’re already judging them and defining them at such a young age?! Isn’t it a bit boring conforming to norms? Surely this is EXACTLY the age where it shouldn’t matter what he looks like? He has a lifetime of school, work and life’s norms and rules to conform to… So for now, could we let him be? And let his hair be wild and free?!
I honestly can’t believe it, it’s flown by and the next 3 months will go so quickly.. before you know it I’ll be sat back at my desk with my work head back on!
Apart from the parenting malarkey, I had visions that I would learn some new skills on my maternity leave like:
I haven’t done any of those! I think the only new thing I’ve done has been blogging… which is a time-consuming hobby but one I’m enjoying and it will also come in handy for my day job (read about it on my ‘about me’ page if you’re interested)
So here’s my mum’s list of things I need to and want to do over the next 3 months – some are chores, some are new skills – either way I find them equally difficult to devote time to without missing out on any of baby W’s time, or catching up with much-needed rest…:
Bit of a random list eh!? Did you use your maternity leave to do anything new (apart from learning how to be a parent obviously ;))? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below, or tweet me at @yummyblogger
A week ago I set myself the challenge of cutting down on my iPhone usage as I was finding myself getting addicted to checking things like Facebook and Twitter a million times a day!
So how did I get on?
Overall result? I like to think I’m slightly less addicted, and if baby W is old enough to take note I hope he has noticed 🙂
Have you tried cutting down too? Any tips you can share with us?!
I had an amazing bit of post last week, possibly one of my favourite pieces ever (it’s up there with penpal letters in my teens, concert tickets in my twenties and wedding invites in my thirties!)
The Welsh Government, has planted not one, but two trees for baby W! One is in a forest in Wales, the other is in a family’s garden in Uganda to help them to try and grow crops and make a living….
The name of the scheme is ‘Plant’ which conveniently translates into the Welsh word for ‘children’. They sent us this certificate which you can see, and also an accompanying letter telling us a bit more about the scheme including the grid reference details for baby W’s tree in South Wales!
Why was it one of my favourite pieces of post?
Further reading if you’re interested:
So what do you think about this? Do they run anything similar in your area? If not would you like them to or do you think it’s a waste of money?! I’d love to hear your thoughts….
Small print: I wasn’t asked by anyone to write this post, I just love the scheme and wanted to spread the word!
My name’s Heledd and I’m addicted to my smartphone…
I think it all started when baby W was a wee newborn and we’d have some epic feeds… 1 or 2 hours glued to the sofa or bed and as much as I love staring at his gorgeous face , I needed something else… Something to keep me awake…
Scroll, scroll, scroll, swipe, swipe, swipe……
He’s now nearly 4 months old and I feel addicted…. I am constantly checking Facebook and twitter! Facebook used to be where I kept in touch and up-to-date with friends. It still is but now I’m also a member of about 10 mummy groups where there’s always dramas, people to help, people to ask for advice…
Ditto twitter, i set up a new account to go with this blog, and so my feed is 99% parenting-related, obviously v useful to a new mum like me! I can check both a gazillion times in a few minutes, and I can guarantee that not much will have it happened since I last checked!
But like I said, I guess it’s habit… A habit that’s just gotten worse (like most habits I guess?)
This all sounds petty… Why does it matter?
Before W came along I’d always said I wouldn’t want my children addicted to iPads and phones like so many kids seem to be. So with me being addicted to my phone, I’m not giving him the best start am I ?! When I mentioned my addiction in baby group last week, a mum to a 6month old said her baby was already wanting to/asking to play with her phone. This mum, and another, both admitted to sneaking a look at their phone while feeding/ playing with their babies, like I do!
Each to their own, but for me, it’s laziness… I might have messages that I haven’t replied to for weeks, but scrolling and swiping are so easy… So lazy! I don’t want baby W to inherit a lazy habit… and I don’t want to miss a thing while he’s awake! Don’t get me wrong – I’m sure he will end up playing with iPads and iPhones – but in moderation, not all the time like his mummy!
Today it stops. My challenge for the week ahead is to leave my phone in another room to the one I’m in. I will only check my phone when baby is napping (so about 3 times a day) I will check it when daddy comes home and takes over for an hour. I will then check it again before bed. This will be similar to my blogging rules – I only blog when baby W is napping in the day… Evening time is time for me and my other half and weekends are family time.
I don’t really check it when I’m out and about – it’s more of a sofa habit.
Find out in a week how I get on… Will my right hand hurt any less? Will I miss out on anything? Will I feel like I’m missing a limb?!
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